Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Manners are not what they used to be...please, thank you, excuse me.....

A people without the knowledge of their past history, origin and culture is like a tree without roots.
Marcus Garvey 

I am appalled at the lack of manners these days. I don't know if I should let this go or if I should hang on tooth and nail and pontificate loudly.
My upbringing was such that there was an unwritten code of rules that one followed. I was born into a middle class family who had endured financial hardship, during that Great Depression. My parents taught me at an early age to say thank you, wait my turn, chew with my mouth closed, not to speak with my mouth full and men and boys were NEVER to come to the table with their hats on! It would appear to all intents and purposes that their financial state did not affect their ability to acknowledge what was considered proper and polite. Courtesy and comportment still mattered.
I see men dining in restaurants and cafes with ball caps on...why? Are they bald? Are they cold?  Did their mothers never tell them that the hat comes off at the table? There is a time and a place for everything...OK wear that cap at the game in the stands, eat your hotdog, burger and drink that beer.
And while I am on the subject, where are the thank you's for gifts and flowers? A telephone call will suffice, definitely not a text or an email.
Pushing ahead in line up at a movie or bakery, what is that all about? I offer the person behind me in line up to move ahead if I have a full cart of groceries and they have a few items, common (or so I would think) courtesy, is it not?
I recently went to the local museum and was standing in front of a display, not too closely mind, as there were others also reading the posted information and a man pushed in front and stood directly in front of me totally obscuring my view...did he not see me?
I am getting worked up over this and I need to find that zen Yoga breath and put things into perspective!
I am quite possibly an over-the-top manner snob!
I phone to thank my host and hostess after a dinner party, acknowledge gifts and flowers, write thank you notes, sympathy cards and letters and send them in the post.
I have heard this before, in the presence of my dear mother...I have become a parrot of sorts but share the same values.
I am now stepping down from the soapbox and slowly walking away....pontificating no more, at least for today!


  1. Lawdy! Dont get me started! I polled my friends on the idea of sending their children to ettiquette classes and not one said they would. Interesting that the ones who replied are the ones with the worst manners! The Americans who replied all said yes they absolutely would! So just so you know, this Canadian thinks Americans are very polite!

  2. Yes, I know this comment is about 2 years late, but I have to vent somewhere LOL - how about brides who don't send thank-you notes for wedding gifts? We're into the seventh month of waiting for some kind, ANY kind of acknowledgement, and we do know that they received and are using our gifts - anyone I talk to about this says that brides just don't do things the same way these days ..... There, not sure if I feel better, but it's said now :)

    1. Oh dear me! Thank you cards are so easy to write and send. The gifts we gave to the brides and grooms have all been formally acknowledged by cards. Manners never go out of fashion.