Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Mother.....

For those of you who have read my blog for awhile you'll know just how close a bond that Mother and I share.
How often we do things together.
Our Seattle trip had been planned for several months and eagerly anticipated by us both.

We had just checked into our suite when Mother felt very tired and she said she needed to go to bed for a nap.
She is 85 so I put this down to travel fatigue and so did Mother.
She assured me that she'd be better after a nap and she shooed me out the door to go and do some shopping.

I left her for an hour
but a second sense, a voice in my head, kept worrying about her while I was out.
I am not one to ignore that little voice...I call it intuition.

When I returned she was feeling really sick and said that she needed to go home.
A few hours later she was vomiting had trouble walking to the bathroom as her legs were weak and she felt dizzy.

I suggested that we go to the hospital as we always travel with extra medical insurance but she refused...
I informed the hotel concierge who set about making arrangements for us to leave.
The staff were so understanding and helpful.

I was terrified,
and my thoughts were that she might not last through the night.
I don't know if I was over reacting, or becoming hysterical with worry,
so I phoned Mr. HB and told him the situation...he helped to calm me down and reassured me.
(Thanks honey)

Alone and afraid and feeling very responsible I thought I should stay up all night and keep watch.
I lasted until 11:30 when fatigue overtook me.
I fell into a deep sleep and woke up at 4:30 when I decided to get up and get ready as we needed to be ready by 6:15 to depart.

We were gone less than 24 hours and went straight to our family doctor when we got back. He was booked up so we saw his partner who ordered some tests and sent us directly to the ER.
We spent an agonizing and tedious 6 hours in and out of the treatment rooms while Mom had a multitude of tests...
then surprisingly they sent her home and told us if she didn't improve in a couple of days to come back!

I have been taking care of her and am sick with worry.

She is pale and tired and if she doesn't start to improve tomorrow I am taking her back.

Mother has a tough constitution so when she is sidelined like this I am beside myself.
She keeps saying she knows her own body, that she's just tired and for me not to worry, but I do.
It's not like her...


I picked my favourite roses for her today, David Austin's Jude the Obscure.

She is resting in bed and I have fed her some scrambled eggs and tea...
Who knows what tomorrow will bring.

I'm not even excited that I found some new things in Seattle.


I took this when we first arrived and I had such hopes for a wonderful holiday.

We always book the same suite 
2 beds
2 bathrooms
a living room
and a view of The Space Needle from the 10th floor.


My trip could be summed up 
"Sleepless in Seattle"

I will be hovering very close and monitoring Mother.
Feeling over tired and stressed to the max
on the verge of tears
I really need to keep my wits about me.

I cannot let Mother see me like this 
or she will start to worry about me 
instead of putting her energy into getting better.

Will keep you posted.

40 comments:

Rebecca said...

I'm sad to hear about the abrupt change in plans. I can imagine that you're sick with worry and all the other stresses involved with the change in plans and responsibility of it all.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I know how frightened I would be in your shoes. You absolutely have your priorities in the right place. I'm sending calm thoughts.

Lisa said...

I'm sorry to hear that your mother is feeling so ill. As a former paramedic, I would just like to encourage you to follow your intuition. You and your mother know when things aren't quite right. If you feel that medical staff is being dismissive...follow your gut. Be sure she is well hydrated and if your intuition tells you all is not well..listen to that voice. Many elderly feel that they are burdening medical staff and it makes me sad to hear this; please let her know she is not a burden to them, they are there to help HER. OK...I'll get off of my soapbox now. I'm just a very strong advocate for the elderly.

Sending good thoughts for wellness and peace for you both.

Patricia said...

Dear Hostess, I'm also sending you good thoughts and hope very much that your mum starts to improve soon.

DaniBP said...

Hostess I am sending my energy your way. Thinking of you and your Mother tonight, I hope she improves very soon. xo.

Marguerite said...

Oh Hostess, I know so well how you are feeling. I have a wonderful 87 yr old mother. We are so very alike and share a close bond. She has had so many medical emergencies. Still she recovers and keeps on going. Her memory is now becoming a problem. I have two sisters and a brother who all love her dearly. I'm hoping all will go well for you and your mother. Prayers coming your way.

Bonnie said...

I am keeping a good thought and sending up a prayer for strength and healing. Please keep us posted. Hugs! Bonnie

Sheila said...

Oh, gosh, that's so stressful! I hope your mom is fine - trust the doctor and try to hang in there. Sending you good vibes! I love that you have such a strong bond.

Jill said...

I am thinking of both you and your mother. It is so very stressful to have a health issue come up during a trip. I hope all goes well, please keep us posted. I'm thinking of you and your mother! And the roses are so beautiful, I hope they lift your morale. XO, Jill

Lynne said...

I am sad for you that you have had this scare. Rightfully so to be concerned. I think you were expedient in getting your mom looked over by the ER and if she isn't better to return for her to be seen again. I know you were excited for your trip, your mom too, no doubt. How fast things change . . . I will be waiting for your update. Your mom is in my thoughts and caring . . . and so are you.

Barb said...

I totally understand your worry. My mom is 91 and when she doesn't feel well I panic. My advice, if she's not better, take her back to ER and i nsist they dig deeper. Take charge ....don't settle for come ack in a day...it might be too late.

Sydney Shop Girl said...

Hostess,
I'm so sorry to hear about your mother not being well.

I really hope she's on the mend and that you get some answers soon.

SSG xxx

Pamela said...

Hope your mother recovers quickly. I know it is difficult to have be the strong one. Take care of your self.
And don't be afraid to be pushy with the doctors if you need to.

Annie ~ Red Roses and Crystal said...

I'm very sorry to hear this Hostess and can totally relate having an aged Mum myself with many health dramas. I have learnt to be her advocate over the years and am now so grateful she is well cared for in her care facility. No stone is unturned when it comes to assuring her health and well being.
On the occasions I've needed to accompany Mum to hospital ER I have absolutely no qualms about speaking up to ensure 100% attention is given my beloved mother (always in a pleasant manner of course).
Follow your gut and you will not go wrong. As another commenter mentioned, the elderly often don't want to bother medical professionals and their families which is terribly sad. This occurred with a dear friend's mother who kept quite for a day about how ill she was feeling. This dear lady had suffered a stroke.
Wishing you and your Mum speedy answers to the tests. All we can do Hostess is love them to bits.
xx

Susan B said...

Oh hostess, I hope it's just a little bug and that your mother is feeling fit again soon. Please get rest when you can and keep us posted.

Pondside said...

Such a worry for you....
I hope your mother will feel better soon - and if not, I trust that you'll trust your instinct and take her back to the hospital. You know your mother better than the ER staff do.
Thinking of you.....

Patricia said...

So sorry to hear about your mother's health situation. Please look after yourself, too, and I can only endorse what others have commented and say you must go back tomorrow if she is no better. I also have had to stand up to professionals over the care of parents. Never easy but sometimes necessary. All the best.
PS Those roses are absolutely beautiful!

Jennifer said...

Oh, I'm so sorry...that is so frightening and you must be exhausted! Please take care of yourself as well and let us know. Sometimes daughters do know best and that can be a very difficult transition for mothers and daughters.

La Vie Quotidienne said...

I am so sorry that your mother is feeling ill and what a bad time for it to happen, when you were out of town. It sounds as if you coped brilliantly. Now that she is home in familiar surroundings I hope that she gains her strenght back quickly.

Marsha said...

I hope that tomorrow will be a better day for you. Sending my best wishes to your Mother.

Mrs. Exeter said...

Dear Hostess - what a horrible worrying time, and made more so by at first being away from home. I hope so much she feels better soon and you can all get some rest. Best wishes xxx

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness, I'm there with you in thought, I hope today is a brighter day for her, please let us know how she's getting on.

Anonymous said...

What a good and caring daughter you are. I hope that your mother recovers soon. Sometimes small illnesses can seem more serious than they are. It must have been scary being so far from home. Sending thoughts and prayers to you and your mother.

Ann

Judith said...

Lesley,thinking of you and Mum,sending warm thoughts to you both. Ida xxxx

The Vivenne Files said...

(((())))

Maggie said...

Thoughts and prayers for you both!

Northmoon said...

Like many others here I have an elderly mother so I can imagine how frightening it was for you when she got ill on your trip. I hope she recovers quickly now that you are home.

the gardener's cottage said...

sending my love and prayers leslie. xo

Anonymous said...

She's so lucky to have you. Wishing her a swift recovery and many more trips ahead with her wonderful daughter!

Anonymous said...

Oh, I'm so sorry. You're a wonderful daughter. I hope Mom makes a full recovery -- and you get some rest, dear Hostess.

Amities,
Marsi

Anonymous said...

I hope your Mom is feeling better very soon! Prayers and good thoughts being sent your way...
Lisa S.

SusanG said...

I'm sorry your mum isn't feeling well. I know how scary that can be to a daughter looking on. I hope she feels better very soon.

Anonymous said...

I hope by the time I'm writing this that she's already doing better. Sending healing energy your way....

mette said...

I´m late with my comment, and hoping too, that things are better by now.
This must be a terrible stress for you. Wishing you strength and your mother a quick recovery.

Anonymous said...

I hope she feels better very soon.

Sheree

Anonymous said...

My prayers are with you for a good recovery for your mother.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear about your Mother -- my prayers will be with her and you.

My 87 year old Mother has lived with me in Virginia for about 11 years. She has had several critical medical emergencies that left me terrified and desperate feeling. I think I know how you feel mentally and physically so make sure you take time to just sit with your cup of tea and breath deeply while thinking of her. Quiet moments have always helped me deal with stressful events.

I have been reading your blog for over a year now and thoroughly enjoy it. When I need a break, I always click on your bookmark and read and reread your posts. I enjoy that you and your Mother are able to get out and about and I truly hope that continues. (p.s. I have never left a comment on a blog, so I hope this works.) Thinking of your Mother from Virginia -- Shelia

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

I am busy helping Mother today and want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your thoughtful and kind words they mean the world to me.
Mother is feeling a wee bit better and she has been able to keep food down.
She got out of bed today, had a shower and has colour in her face.
She also "ordered" me to go home and do something nice for myself :-)

Anonymous said...

Leslie:
So sorry to read of your distress. I wish you both the best in the coming days. I know how much you and your Mom enjoy each other's company. Good health and good wishes to you both. Peg

Lorrie said...

Sorry to hear of your stressful time. It's hard when those we love are ill. I hope your sweet mother continues to improve. Take care of yourself, too.