Let me start by stating that I am not a Pollyanna...
I am by nature an optimist
I lean towards sappy
I am very much a family gal
I befriend for life
my ties are strong
I defend my beliefs...
(I can be stubborn)
I have not always been in a happy place
I went through a patch of poutiness and darkness in early menopause
I felt profound sadness
and didn't know why
I spent many years tending to the needs of others
my family
my job
working here to keep the home fires burning
working at school
my life was fast paced
demanding
and I was in constant
fight or flight
mode.
I put my own needs aside in a corner
I would ignore them
I felt that all the other things required of me were of a high priority
until...
one day I felt very blue
and weary
laden with a heavy burden
WHY?
I had questions and no answers...
I went through the motions of work
home keeping
mothering
entertaining
volunteering
attending meetings
balancing the cheque book
grocery shopping
cooking
weeding the garden
and I felt
something was amiss
What?
I read self help books
ate chocolate
and settled upon the book
Simple Abundance
by Sarah Ban Breathnach
which was instrumental in my healing.
I found myself
savouring
noticing
taking time to get to know what I liked and enjoyed
time to
honour and nurture
myself
Hello Me!
That was quite a few years ago and I have never looked back.
I have grieved the death of both of our fathers
supported 2 family members with cancers
and
have had to find my own way
and not get bogged down with negativity.
Some simple things that make and keep me happy are:
My
love of the ocean
the fresh salt air
the sound of the lapping waves
The waterfront walk
not far from The Bungalow
it
calms
refreshes
recharges
I can sit and ponder
reflect
and de-stress
and look at the view
beyond
breathing in beauty
The ocean changes with the tides and weather
the colours can be bright or grey and dull
it can be warm and calm or stormy and cold.
as long as I am dressed for the weather
I am happy to be walking
There are so many simple things that contribute to my well being
and most of them are free
Hunting and gathering
from nature
"found items"
things that I do not set out to look for...
seem to find their way into my gaze
and I am pleased
and often surprised
shells
feathers
driftwood
foliage
flowers
stones
Gifts...
unexpected
out of the blue
significant when made by the giver
Arts and Crafts candlesticks designed and crafted by darling son
in shop class at school
made of oak
with copper tops
and only pure beeswax candles can live here!
I adore and honour beeswax
the scent
the warm and gentle light
and that all those wonderful industrious bees co-operated to make the wax.
I use these often
and when I light the flame
I take a moment to reflect and give thanks.
I love a phone conversation
with my BFF
it can be a short or long call
sharing life and events
checking in to see how she is doing
what's new
what might be troubling her
what her family is up to...
the sound of her voice
checking in and connecting
we laugh
we cry
it's pure
and honest
it's what we do....
My Family...
my children
my husband...
and Isla
grand daughter
of 12 weeks
whose smile can light up a room
she is such a sweet little girl
who has entered my world
and given me such immense joy
that it is hard to describe...
I would love to see her everyday
just thinking about her puts a smile on my face
my brag book is full!
I know that life has many twists and turns and I have no idea what is around the next corner for me...
but I do know that how I react to these events
and the tools that I employ to get me through the rough bits
are key for me.
More another day.....are your thoughts of gratitude?
So much greatness....in unexpected places.
Hugs from the Hostess