Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Meeting a reader...with Mother who does not understand the word or concept of blogging!

Mother and I stood in line at Good Things Consignment in Oak Bay this afternoon
we were waiting to consign some of her cast offs...
my sister and I had been at her condo the evening prior and we tackled 2 closets, a cabinet and the buffet.
Several boxes were packed and I picked Mom up today to take her things...
it is a rare scene that has Mother de-cluttering...

I am known as the "de-clutter queen" in the family.
Mother and sister hang onto their "stuff."


Mom offered these three florals and I said yes...
they were always front and centre on the mantle or a table in our home when I was growing up.
I popped them into my cabinet as a "memory keeper."
My husband is not a fan of these but they take up a small amount of space.
I am trying to rationalize and justify this "emotional stuff"...
Mother is really letting go
not her usual style
and I am wary.

Am I reading too much into this change of behaviour?


Mom thought her teacups too many,
her crystal collection too full
 and her knick-knacks were just gathering dust...
true there is less housework with fewer things.


These tulips are blooming despite their leaves being munched by the local deer.


While waiting in line we met Elaine,
a blog reader who recognized me and said "do you write a blog? are you the hostess?"
She has recently relocated to Victoria and I was happy to make her acquaintance...but with my focus on Mother I was remiss and did not get her contact information so that we might meet again...so Elaine if you are reading please email me and I would love to meet you for coffee or tea sometime soon.

I went to meet the specialist this morning
she looked about 21 years old...
and confirmed the "frozen shoulder" diagnosis.
She has prescribed 3 cortisone shots to be administered by a radiologist a month apart and told me to continue my exercises and continue massage if it is helping.
It will be the better part of a year before I heal...

So patience is going to be utmost on my agenda.


I will  look closely at the beauty in my daily round

So dear readers please indulge me as I plan to capture all and sundry on my walks.
I might bore you to tears...


the only bleeding heart will be this floral representation


as I am fortifying
with great books 
while sipping hot tea 
counting my blessings

It could be worse...

Thank you for stopping by.

~ Be Well and Be Kind ~

39 comments:

Jim & Sonya Guthrie said...

Your Mother knew to offer you those beautiful rose floral china pieces...they will be a great remembrance of her, your childhood, and your love of roses. I too have quite a few memory pieces of my mother. This October it will be 10 years since she passed away, but those pieces give me a sweet connection to her. Be thankful for her and her few things of memory ;)

Anonymous said...

From Margie in Toronto - love your attitude to the shoulder issues - hopefully the Cortisone shots plus the exercise will do the trick.
I love your photography and am very envious of your Spring weather - we are expecting another couple of inches of snow today and then a LOT of rain. A friend emailed yesterday to tell me the bluebells were starting to come up in an area I love to go to each Spring but that everyone was worried that this latest cold & snow would kill them - we are keeping our fingers crossed!

Stephen Andrew said...

What lovely flowers! I think the little porcelain flowers are so sweet. How funny to be recognized like that! I'm trying to do a little decluttering too but I'm bringing new stuff in faster than old is going out.

Madame Là-bas said...

We have one "curio cabinet" that holds family ornaments. Belleek from my Irish heritage, a Shetland pony ornament from a deceased great-aunt, mother-in-law's Moorcroft and a few sundry pieces. Monsieur is not fond and calls it the bricabrac but I grew up in a household that valued such things. I think that it must have been a symbol of middle-class status to be able to buy "an ornament" or to inherit a piece of "fine bone china". Your mother is showing
a proactive attitude towards her belongings. Do you think that she is contemplating
a move? Mine keeps telling me that she receives mail from our local independent living facility but I think that she is still too independent to give up grocery shopping, food preparation and housework. These tasks are still part of her identity. Funny about the blog thing! My mum can't understand why "strangers" would want to read about someone else's
day to day life. It's good that you know what to expect with your shoulder. I just finished reading Everything I Never Told You by Cynthia Ng. I could not put it down. I might be due for a Paris book. Enjoy the spring walks!

Susan said...

How much fun to be recognized by a reader!

And, I know how painful frozen shoulder is--as I have been there twice. I'm glad you got in to see the specialist. I'm sure healing is on the way!

Susan said...

One more comment. I understand about keeping whatnots that may not be your style. I have three little Meissen ballerinas that belonged to my mother (who is 93 now). They are not my style, but I have them in my china cabinet--just because.

Lorrie said...

So sorry about the continuing issues with your shoulder. I'm glad you were able to see the specialist (they do seem so young, don't they?) who advised patience. Tea, appreciating beautiful spring, and good books are lovely ways to wait.

TARYTERRE said...

The florals are lovely. Sorry to hear about your shoulder. Staying calm and taking care of it is the best way to cope.

Poppy B. said...

I think it's great that a reader recognized you and spoke up. I got an email from a reader who saw me in a restaurant in Palm Beach, and I was disappointed that she hadn't approached. I mean, neither of us lives in Palm Beach, so what were the odds? It would have been nice to chat with her.

And I don't think you're reading too much into your mother's behavior. I too have an aging mother and a frozen shoulder ... adulting can be hard at times!

Love the flower pictures, as always. Gives me something to look forward to here in Chicago, where we barely have daffodils at the moment.

La Vie Quotidienne said...

I inherited two of those delightful flower-bouquet porcelains, they are marked Royal Adderley and both were purchased by family members on trips to Victoria. They are probably cousins to yours...small world.

I hope with care a patience your shoulder will mend soon. I know it is difficult not to be able to do everything you want.

Your Leucojum are so pretty, I always think of them as belonging in a garden with fairies.

Patricia said...

Dear Hostess - you could never bore us !
My dear Mother also collected a few of the flower bouquet porcelains - my sister and I treasure them now that she and my Dad have passed on...I go through periods like your Mum is now - just like to clear things out occasionally so my kids won't be stuck doing it 'one day'.....

Anonymous said...

I love to hear about the gentle rhythm of your days. I hope your shoulder gets better soon. I just threw my back out recently and have newfound sympathy for pain!

Julie said...

Your mum is wise in her decision to give her family choices of what they want ahead of time. The less she has, the better she can deal with everyday decisions. It may mean she can stay in her home longer. And less stuff, less cleaning.

Glad you're getting medical assistance with the shoulder.

Anonymous said...

I know you won't agree or like what I am going to say-it it will be a year with or without the cortisone shots. If you have not had one before-extreme pain for very little (and only temporary gain).FS is a bugger and you just have to get through it-gentle exercise for mobility, massage or heat or whatever gives it some relief-nothing will make it go away. It is a year more or less no matter what you do. (I had two FS and was able to consult an Olympic doctor and world renown orthopedic surgeon). He was absolutely right-10 months in and the "thawing began". He was adamant that nothing works but time and gentle care.

LPC said...

A lot to deal with at once, your mother aging, your blog growing, your shoulder not well. Some good, some hard, some just the process of life. Take time for yourself, dear Leslie.

Anonymous said...

have to say this. I had frozen shoulder ten years ago.everyone said oh no don't get cortisone shot. I did. three , best thing ever!!!!! have had no pain and I suffered so so bad not even sleeping. will do it again if need be. good luck

KSL said...

My mother and grandmother both had numerous "collections" and now I'm trying to figure out what to do with everything. So much memory and emotions tied into these objects. I hope you get big relief from the cortisone shots. Curious if your mom ever reads your blog?

materfamilias said...

Those porcelain roses are obviously of a different aethetic than the rather strict form and design of your heritage home, but because of the very spareness of that background, they will work there, I'm guessing. I'm always surprised to see the way my daughter has integrated a few of my mom's Hummel figurines into a small vignette on a shelf in her otherwise quite minimalist bathroom -- where their tendency to kitsch is muted and their sweet simplicity stands out. (poor Mom, she loved Hummels when she was a young adut, and then they became the default gift for a lifetime so that she'd amassed over 20 by the end and I suspect had long since tired of them)
So sorry your frozen shoulder is being so stubborn, but it does sounds as if you have good care and a great attitude.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your beautiful pictures and observations! My mom suffers from Alzheimer's disease, and now lives in an assisted living facility where we have carefully decorated it with spare by lovely artwork and mememtos. She was always an avid collector of pretty dishes, teacups, crystal, figures, and other more unusual ornamentations. We have appreciated her love of "pretty things" and done our best to incorporate some of her pieces in our collections, while spreading others to my numerous cousins. My mom and her love of pretty things created an indelible and wonderful atmosphere in her home. Her graciousness and use of her pretty things made everyone feel special! In that spirit, we are spreading the love. Enjoy your beautiful roses!

Jen Lawrence said...

I hope the cortisone works. Patience is very hard, isn't it.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

They will be cared for here from now on...and she feels happy that I decided to keep them. Our home is so small that I cannot take too much!

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

I heard that it snowed back east!
Hope your Spring is not too far off...
I do those bluebells are hardy plants...a bunch would be pretty in a vase with the snow as a backdrop.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Your collection of LeCreuset is pretty impressive as are all your lovely dishes and table accessories, which are really very necessary as you entertain your guests in such fabulous style!

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

I could not agree more...Bric a Brac is something that only those with extra money could afford to buy...necessities like food and heat were the first priority in a humble home.
Mother does not ever want to move out of her condo! We have discussed this as both my sister and I thought she would enjoy being with more people her own age as so many of the elders in her building have moved or passed away. I know she is lonely but she makes the effort to get out every day and also walks for 20 minutes near her home.
Mom is also so private and would never dream of sharing any personal information on line!
I need to get my hands on more Paris themed books too.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

I think we keep these wee treasures out of respect for our Mothers.
I have been prescribed a muscle relaxant for bedtime and have had two nights of restful sleep!

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

The weather has been so wonderful this week!
My walks have been a pleasure...so many cheery flowers and happy people in my neighbourhood.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Thank you...doing my best and just knowing what to expect is half the battle.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

I met another blogger at Good Things several years ago and we met for coffee, have enjoyed a few walks together and went out with some other bloggers for an afternoon tea. It really is a small world.
Oh dear you too? I hope that you get some relief soon...

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Royal Adderly is the stamp on the base of mine too!
Purchase in Victoria!!! No that is a coincidence...so were Mother's, I would guess from Birks but maybe a local china shop or The Empress Hotel.
Do you know what shop yours were purchased from?

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Oh how sweet of you to say that Patricia!
Mother is very considerate on this issue and funny on other things...she can be stubborn and loves to exert control...I am so grateful that she is doing so well and that we live so close to each other.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

She will probably stay in her home forever...if we can afford it she will have caregivers if needed and a cleaning gal. We are not pushing her at all just keeping a close eye on things when we visit...I have offered to do her house work but she is fiercely independent which is a good thing in so many ways.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

I was told it would be a year either way but the specialist said that the shot would help ease some of the discomfort and the other things I am doing were helpful too...and you are so right about it being a long process.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Thank you Lisa...life has ups and downs as you know.
We can only do our best when situations arise that challenge us, what is it they say? What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Good that it worked for you...I am willing to give it a try.
Thank you!

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Mom does not even own a computer or a cellphone!
Mom is also paring down her silver ware...too much polishing required and she has done it twice a year for the past 60 plus years!

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

They will be kept behind glass in the cabinet as Mr. HB is not a fan of their design! I understand as we have a few things from his family that are stored away...Hummels were very popular when I was younger as were the Royal Doulton figurines and Lladro...homes seemed to be much fuller with knick knacks back when I was growing up.
How is the house hunting going?

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

What a beautiful comment you have left on the blog...your Mother sounds like a lovely and gracious woman as do you...take care and I hope you will pop back again and leave a comment in the future.

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

Indeed it is...but I am filling my time with many distractions and taking long walks.

The Vivenne Files said...

I could never be bored with the beautiful things you show; sometimes when I have more pain than usual, I can look at your photographs and enjoy the beauty. We can gripe about pain together!
hugs,
Janice